Assassin's Creed III vs Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag

I'm new to the Assassin's Creed series. I started with the fourth entry, Black Flag, which is basically a pirate simulator that someone at Ubisoft thought was a better idea than making another Assassin's Creed game, but the Ubisoft execs decided to call it Assassin's Creed anyway because they need to make a new one of those games every year or else they can't buy baguettes for their French children.

So, after loving Black Flag I recently decided I would give the only other entry that came out on Wii U a try—Assassin's Creed III. The experience so far has been somewhat different from Black Flag, so I thought I would briefly compare my first impressions with each game.

In Assassin's Creed III, you start out as Desmond the Mild and fumble around a cave for a bit until he feels le tired and takes a nap. Then you take control of Daddy Assassinbucks and crawl around a theatre during (from what I can gather from the audience's reactions) the boring-est play ever. Your objective is to reach the balcony and politely kill an old dude with a quick time event as he sits quietly in his chair. He's actually quite agreeable about the whole thing, so I didn't feel too bad as I casually walked out of the theatre. This sequence is slow even by this game's standards, but at least you can hold the B button to power walk to the exit.

After that you get on the boat to 'Merica, where you get to wander back and forth SEVERAL times and take SEVERAL naps while the captain warns you about a mutiny that never happens and a fight with another ship full of templars that also never happens. Instead you (politely) fight one skinny guy who offers you a sword so you can kill him in two button presses, and then you tie some ropes during a storm that barely causes the boat to rock. Finally, you slowly climb to the crow's nest to look over the fog so you can spot Silent Hill in the distance as the opening titles start to play—roughly two hours into the game.

By comparison, in Assassin's Creed IV: Black Flag you play as Edward Kenway who has left his girlfriend to become a pirate because that is the correct choice to make when presented with those two options.

You start out with a ship battle against I'm gonna say the Spanish, where you fire the ship's cannons and then board the enemy ship to kill some dudes before both ships explode. After swimming to shore you chase an assassin through a forest and kill him in a fight that takes more than two button presses. Then you assassinate a bunch of soldiers in order to take command of YOUR OWN SHIP, which you sail out of the harbor as fucking whales and dolphins splash around as if to say "FUCK YES, EDWARD. YOU ARE A FUCKING PIRATE KING ASSASSIN NOW."

That is when I came.

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